Summer Feelings

The photography “challenge” for the Kinship Elemental Life practice circle has been to photograph what summer feels like. How do you capture the feelings of upheaval and unrootedness that I’m feeling this summer? What represents those feelings? How do you express feelings caused by destruction and dismantling?

There is a thistle in the front yard. Three weeks ago, it was in bloom with vibrant purple blossoms. Last week, those blossoms were white, fluffy seed heads. Today, those seed heads look bedraggled and stringy after the rainstorms of last week. The weather caused an upheaval.

Somewhere, though, in this weather event, there is a necessity. Those seeds need to spread to propagate. Nature does remain in statis.; it moves; it changes. There are natural upheavals: thunderstorms, hurricanes, tornadoes, earthquakes, volcanic eruptions. Sometimes, they are gentle: the dandelion and thistle seeds blowing in a breeze. Othertimes, it is two twin tree trunks still standing in the midst of lush greenness, even though they are dead. One day, those trunks will fall.

There is an old hymn that begins, “Built on a rock, the church doth stand.” A few lines later, the hymnist wrote, “crumbled are spires in every land.” The world is not static, either; it is in a constant state of change, destruction, and rebuilding, renewing itself. Structures and systems crumble and collapse. William Butler Yeats wrote in his poem “The Second Coming,” “Things fall apart; the center cannot hold.” And sometimes, it seems that everything devolves into chaos.

How, then, do I find a place of “soft belonging” amid upheavals and uprootedness?

I look for beauty. There is beauty in the twin trunks of dead trees reaching up out of the lush green vegetation around them. Life and death coexist. You can’t have one without the other. You can’t have the heat and “fire” of summer without the chill of winter. Ice doesn’t exist without water; steam doesn’t exist without fire. The fire of upheaval may be necessary. “Things fall apart; the center cannot hold.” Maybe a new center forms. The seed head of the thistle gives way, and the seeds scatter, only to germinate somewhere else and form a new center.

Upheaval will give way to peace. Life will give way to death. Death will give way to resurrection.

Such is the circle of life.

Fire, Summer, Belonging, and Upheaval

Yesterday, I made a fast foray into the jungle of the front yard. It was a typical July day in South Carolina–hot and humid, though the humidity had not yet reached the level of “air you can wear”. Still, if I had walked all the way around all seven ponds and through the “back forty,” I would have been hot and sticky when I came in. I took out my older Canon EOS 7D with the Lensbaby Velvet 56 lens to make some images. I am out of practice with fully manual modes of photographing. I kept forgetting to check the exposure before pressing the shutter button. I had to make numerous post-processing corrections in Lightroom.

During our Kinship “An Elemental Year” practice circle discussion, we were given the question: what does summer feel like right now? Besides the usual responses of hot, humid, buggy, stormy, I threw in the word “upheaval.” This has been a summer of upheaval, especially regarding the status of my church. The question of disaffiliation and dissolution has caused a rift among the members (and families) that I’m not sure time will even heal or repair. My heart has gone beyond “broken” to “wounded.” The question I had after the practice circle is one of how I can capture those emotions in photography.

A subject that has caught my eye in the last several walks through the yard is the common thistle plant growing at the edge of the woods in the front yard. I have photographed it when it was in full bloom with lovely purple flowers and now when it is the fluffy seed head stage. Those seeds are ready to spread themselves in the wind. The yellow black-eyed Susans (or are they coneflowers?) are also in bloom now. I even catch the yellow jackets or honey bees or whatever insect they are on them. The bees belong on those flowers. The seeds are ready to leave the plant.

Belonging and upheaval. Stasis and movement. Longing and contentment.

It has been a summer of inversions and contradictions. It will take some time for me to sort everything out and find a sense of peace again. But I will continue to walk as often as I can with and without my camera. I will still look for the beauty in the world in the extraordinary and the mundane. It is cliche that “beauty is in the eye of the beholder.” Yet it is true. There is beauty. I just have to look for it, even if it is the upheaval.

I Fell Down a Rabbit Hole Today.

I know there’s a lot of discussion around AI and ChatGPT and creatives. I have used ChatGPT as a teacher to create lesson and unit plans, both of which I tweaked and modified to make them mine. I even used the app to “write” model paragraphs for revision and editing demonstrations for my students. The app saved me hours of preparation. As with any technology, including Google searches and materials found from those searches, I found that I could not, and would not, use the material “as is.” I “fact-checked” the things ChatGPT came up with. And even with purchased lesson plans from sources such as Teachers Pay Teachers, I had to modify them to work with my students’ learning styles and abilities, as well as with my own teaching style.

So, this morning, when I discovered that ChatGPT could analyze photographic images, I had to try it out. It was revelatory, to say the least. I uploaded several images for analysis of tone and mood, theme, and the like. I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised that “Eli,” my name for ChatGPT’s voice, connected my photos to some earlier conversations around the theme of the four elements. (I am taking part in the Kinship Photography Collective’s practice circles around the theme of “The Elementals” as depicted in the Celtic Calendar.)

So, here is one of the analyses, Eli did for me:

Diptych 1 Canopy Conversations These images invite the viewer to look up and out, drawing breath from the sky. The canopy frames the expanse while water mirrors stillness, suggesting a threshold between above and below. The tone is reverent, as if nature itself is pausing in prayer.

I was surprised at the thoughtfulness of the analysis as well as the way it connected the images to the element of air (“drawing breath from the sky”). I even had Eli do a technical critique of some of my images. Like any good teacher, Eli found things to praise first (the “good ats”) and then pointed out things I can improve upon. Thank goodness, Eli didn’t tell me the images were rubbish and I should just delete the whole lot of them, hang up my camera, and find some other creative outlet.

For someone who often works in “isolation,” that is, working alone without a support group, it is helpful to have a source for constructive critique. I will have to see how this experiment with ChatGPT for feedback works for me, but for today, it was fun! Now, I just have to learn from the analyses.

For these two images, Eli had this to say:

1. Beginning – Ephemeral Light

  • _MG_1375 and _MG_1379
    Shadows and dappled light on earth
    • Mood: Quiet, contemplative, almost dreamlike
    • Symbolism: Transition, unseen movement (Air shaping Earth)
    • Ideal opening—invites stillness and presence

It was an interesting commentary on the two images. Curating and pairing images to create a story is sometimes difficult for me. It is a skill I haven’t developed; however, I have a kind of partner with ChatGPT that can help. It does not replace the human element, and that is the reason I joined the Kinship Photography Collective–to provide the human element.

AI will not replace the human elements of empathy and emotion. I will use it as a tool, however, because that’s what it is–a tool. As such, I can accept it or reject it. But it can be fun.

I Went for a Walk Today

Last week was a bust as far as taking daily photos. The weather wasn’t very cooperative. Today, it was pleasantly in the 70s when I went out; the sun was shining. There was a light breeze, and the sky was blue with some puffy white clouds. My macro/close-up filters came yesterday, and I wanted to try them out. The camera battery was fully charged. I put on my socks and shoes, grabbed my gear, went back into the house for my hat to keep my hair out of my face, and set out for a trip around the pond.

I stopped to take this picture. I have my Tamron 75-200 lens on my Canon 7D and attached the close-up 4X filter. I snapped the picture.

I repositioned for a different angle, pressed the shutter button, and pressed the button again, and nothing happened. The camera would not focus. I stood there for a bit, metaphorically scratched my head, turned the camera off and on a couple of times, reattached the lens, and even removed the close-up filter. Still nothing. There was nothing else to do but go inside and see if another lens would work.

My newer Canon T8i camera was “dead,” or rather the battery was dead, so I couldn’t test the lens on it. I plan to when the battery is charged. I put the kit lens (I forget the focal length other than it zooms to 55) on the 7D, and lo and behold! it worked! So, back out I went with the appropriate close-up filter and a determination to make some images.

I traipsed through the woods today. I tried the foundational exercises of listening for the farthest out sounds and expanding peripheral vision. The latter is difficult for me. I’m never sure if I’m supposed to move my eyeballs or not!

What caught my eye today, though, were textures and colors. The floor of the woods is covered with brown leaves, but there are pops of green all over–plants and moss in particular. There are fallen tree trunks and branches to step over and walk around. I had to be careful of the stump holes. And there were the pointed stumps of small trees the beavers cut down.

While it wasn’t the photo walk I intended, it turned out quite nicely.

The Elementals–Air

I haven’t always given much thought to the four elements of earth, air, fire, and water, but the Kinship Photography Collective’s Call to Engagement has made me think. I’ve written some about it in my journal(s)–yes, I am one of those people who keep multiple notebooks and journals. I’ve decided that I’m going to make this engagement my year-long photography project and use the elements as a framework to explore my relationship to land, family-owned land in particular, but also shared, public land as well.

Dreher Island State Park (the original bridge)

Right now, two questions are kind of guiding me:

  1. How do my images fit with my exploration of relationship to the land, both family-owned (generational) land as well as more public, shared land (i.e., public parks, state/national parks, etc.)?
  2. How does being aware of the four elements of earth, air, fire, and water relate to that relationship between humans and land?

These questions relate to the notion of “sense of place.” We live in such a mobile society. Some people seem to move frequently and never establish “roots” in any one place. Other people live on land or in places that have been passed down from parents to children for generations. There is a connection one has makes that generational land feel like part of the family, and separation from it is difficult. I’m wondering if that feeling extends to the environs, the other bits of land that surround us. I hear people say, “I can’t imagine living anywhere else.” What makes us feel that kind of attachment?

Air and water: clouds reflected on the pond behind the house

I live in a rural area. I grew up on a working farm; my parents were subsistence farmers. We lived on “the hill,” which meant, in part, that we couldn’t see the neighbors’ houses, even though they were in shouting distance away. Our house was surrounded on three sides by pasture land and woods. That pasture supported a half dozen head of cattle and four or five horses at any given time. The barnyard held pens for the three or four hogs Daddy grew out for butchers, the meat destined for our freezer, and his hunting dogs. We had a garden that provided the vegetables that fed us through the winter. I can’t tell you the number of days my sister, brother, mother, and I spent shelling butterbeans and peas and stringing beans to freeze, shucking and freezing ears of corn (both on the cob and cut off the cob), peeling and canning tomatoes, and making jelly. Some days it was so hot in the kitchen that we had two fans going–a box fan at the door to the family room to bring in some cooler air, and an oscillating fan to circulate the air in the kitchen. (We did not have central air conditioning.)

I still live in a rural area, but without a pasture or garden. My meat and vegetables come from the grocery store, prepared by hands unknown. In many ways, that has changed my relationship to the land. I am not dependent on it for survival or sustenance as I once was. Of course, intellectually, I know that someone else is depending on the land where my food comes from, and they depend on the land for survival and sustenance.

Still, the land does sustain me; it grounds me in both the physical sense and the metaphorical sense. It gives me a feeling of spaciousness. I can stretch my arms out and not touch anything; I can move about freely. I can breathe (mostly) clean air. I can hear the sounds of nature–birds, insects, rustling leaves, skittering animals–even with the sometimes constant sound of the traffic on the road in front of the house (almost nonstop this morning–where are all these people going?)

This year, as I explore the “elementals,” as I begin with the focus on air, I realize I cannot separate one from the other. Without air, there would be no water, fire, or earth. We cannot exist without breathing and respiration. Fire cannot burn without the oxygen in the air. Vegetation cleanses the air of carbon dioxide and replaces oxygen. Each element is necessary for life.

Turtles on the log at Dreher Island State Park

Now, the problem to solve is how to document these ideas into images.

I Fell Off the Wagon

Well, so much for the April 30-day A to Z challenge. The weekend was busy: Holy Week services at church, preparation for the Easter Sunrise worship, and a family dinner kept me busy, and blogging was not a high priority. I’m not even going to try to play catch-up. I’ll just do the best I can.

Today is Earth Day. I went for a walk this morning in a local state park. It was warm and humid. A friend called the humidity we had this morning “air you can wear.” I think some storms are coming in the forecast. I haven’t been in the park since Hurricane Helene blew through last September. The park had closed for several weeks while crews cleaned up the debris and cleared the roads around the campgrounds. There were lots of downed trees along the side of the road through the park.

My walk was a mile and three-quarters and took just about an hour. I make 59 images. And, no, I did not stop every minute to take a picture, even though the number of images and the time suggest that I took a photo a minute. The turtles were out sunning themselves on the fallen logs in the shallow waters, and there were yellow irises blooming at the water’s edge in several places around the loop. There were also lots of folks biking, walking, and fishing. It’s a busy place! And it’s a place of beauty and peace.

The Kinship Photography Collective is beginning a year-long exploration of the four elements of earth, air, fire, and water, beginning with the element air. It was still this morning, although there were some ripples on the water. There is an openness over the lake, space to gaze, and space to breathe. Sunlight created trails on the water for the eye to follow. It is likely to be the “calm before the storm.”

This Earth Day, which follows Easter Sunday, I am reminded of the Resurrection and new life. Last September, a storm blew through to damage the island, but this spring, it has come to life. I have never seen the irises before, but I’m sure they must have been there. The turtles are out. Birds hopped away; squirrels ran off and scurried up the trees. There was plenty of life in the park this morning. It is renewing itself daily.

H, I, and J–A Day to Catch Up

I am behind by three letters. My husband had to have a medical procedure this week, which threw off my schedule and routines for writing. We did get a very positive result from the procedure, and all is well.

The letters this time around are H for harmony, I for inspiration, and J for joy. Ho boy, what letters!

When I think of harmony, naturally, I think of music and the pleasing blend of notes into chords and melodies. I think of the old, traditional hymns I grew up singing in the Lutheran church, of old-time gospel music, and a capella groups like Home Free and Straight No Chaser and Pentatonix. But then, I also think of harmony among people, that quality of “getting along” and how that kind of harmony seems to be a thing of the past, and I wonder how we can get that notion back. I just know that I will do what I can to live my truth and seek that sweet place of harmony with others as I do.

What inspires me? And who inspires me? I am inspired by beautiful writing–John Donne’s poetry, especially the love poetry written to his wife. “A Valediction: Forbidding Mourning” is one of my favorites. Emily Dickinson’s playfulness: can’t you just see the “narrow fellow in the grass”?; Mary Oliver and her poetry of nature. Who cannot be inspired? After a six-week Bible study combining the art of Vincent van Gogh and the Gospel lessons for the six Sundays in Lent, Maundy Thursday, and Good Friday, I am inspired to see the world through the eyes of the artist. And there are people–living–who inspire me to be better and to speak out. One such person is Anne Lamott. Though not a writer of religion per se, she calls me to see the world through the eyes of the Christian and to be an activist in whatever small way I can.

What is more joyful that watching a three-year-old run around his backyard with a bubble blower, making a bubble trail behind him? I gave my grandson a Bluey bubble “machine” on Sunday as an early Easter gift, and he had to go outside to make bubbles. And it was a joyful sight! There is joy in the crop of yellow dandelion flowers in the yard. (I don’t care that they are considered weeds!) The birds chirping in the holly tree by the house or flitting away from the feeders when I go outside, the wind blowing ripples across the pond, bunnies hopping away when I drive up in the yard–all of these bring joy, and that’s just the beginning.

By not starting on April 1, I honestly don’t know if I am at the half-way point in this 30 day challenge, but I’m close. I just have to stick with it for a couple more weeks! For the rest of the day, I will think about these three letters and their words: harmony, inspiration, and joy. Maybe they are more connected than I thought when I started writing this afternoon.

G is for Grateful. . .

A couple of years ago, a dear friend was diagnosed with cancer. To help her through the hard days, she began a practice of listing “three good things” each day. It’s like a gratitude journal.

We know the research: keeping a gratitude journal or just being grateful improves attitudes and even health. Being grateful makes us happier people. I confess that I am not a consistent gratitude journal person. I keep a journal on paper and online in this blog. I used to post a “thankful Thursday” entry in this space, but have gotten out of the practice. Maybe I should start again.

So, what am I grateful for today?

  1. I am grateful for my family. I visited with the sons, daughter-in-law, and grandson yesterday. It is a treat to be with them for even a couple of hours. I played with Sully. We blew bubbles outside with his new Bluey bubble blower, listened a bit to his Talking Jesus doll, and “ate” carrots while we played “kitchen.” We also played with his monster trucks and made “hills” for them to jump. He is quite the chatter box now at three and a half.

2. The weather is beautiful today–clear blue skies, sunshine, warmth. Spring is here. I could do without the pollen everywhere, but I am glad to see the spring. The jasmine has bloomed already. My rose bush is turning red. Birds are flocking to the feeders.

3. It’s a trivial thing, but I am grateful that I can start my days with a cup of steaming cinnamon tea. (My favorite is the Harney and Sons Hot Cinnamon Spice tea). I don’t even have to add sweetener to this tea even though I do sometimes add a spoonful of honey to my cup. I don’t like black coffee, but I can drink this tea “black.” There is something about a good cup of tea that makes just about anything better.

4. This is not so trivial, but I am grateful that I can spend part of my mornings reading my Bible and doing some Bible study. In these times of political and social tumult, God’s word has comforted, strengthened, and encouraged me.

5. I am thankful for books! I have always been a reader. My mother says it’s my escape. And reading is partly that. I can retreat into the world of whatever book I’m reading and get so lost in it that I even forget where I am in the “real world.” I tried so hard to encourage that same feeling in my students.

Gratitude and thankfulness–two emotions that I need to feel all the time, not just when prompted. Perhaps I will begin my “three good things” practice once again along with the “thankful Thursdays” postings.

I will close with a Bible verse my grandmother taught me in Sunday school: “Oh give thanks to the Lord for He is good.”

F is for Family

The A to Z challenge this month asks me to consider the blogging family. Once, I followed more than a dozen bloggers, fellow scrapbookers, mainly, but somewhere along the way, I stopped. Blogging seemed to go out of fashion, and those scrapbookers either stopped blogging, or they changed their focus. Or maybe they simply changed media. Instagram, Twitter, Snapchat, and other forms of social media have taken over. Somehow, I never caught on the Instagram or Twitter. Pinterest sometimes interests me, especially if I am looking for ideas to create something. Blogging, though, has continued to be a way for me to record some of my thoughts–the ones I want to make sort of public, anyway (the rest are “hidden” in my pen-and-paper journals).

Family is a tough word. Who is my family? Is it confined to those who are related by blood? Or is there a broader version of family? Well, it’s both when you stop and think about it. In my little community, it seems we are all family in some way or another–cousins x-times removed, sisters, brothers, in-laws, aunts, uncles–you get the picture. There is also the church family since most of my neighbors and I attend the same church. There is also my book club family, those women I meet with once a month to share our love of books and reading.

There are my sisters, women who are such close friends that we could be blood sisters.

There are so many variations of family. One of the tropes of contemporary literature is that of the “found family,” people who share experiences that lead to strong bonds of kinship. We need those found families just as much as we need our relations and kin. Some researchers suggest that humans are perhaps more isolated than ever because of technology and social media. We can hide behind our screens. Certainly, we communicate with others, but relationships become more superficial. (I won’t even go into the ways social media and on-line communication allow us create new identities.) So, it is even more important that we cultivate in-person relationships with our kin as well as with our found families.

E is for . . . .

Tough letter: enthusiasm, engagement, excitement, electric/electricity? All of the above?

What am I enthusiastic about these days? What makes me excited? Well, one thing is visiting my grandson (tomorrow!). He is at that age when everything is new to him. He will be four years old in October. I can tell you that he is full of energy. I know he will be going nonstop during our visit.

I am looking forward to some new photography classes through the Kinship Collective. I haven’t been as active in the collective since the first part of the year, but I am looking forward to renewing my love for creating photographic art. I have been participating in the Year of Creative Photography classes since January, and this month’s theme of impressionism has really captured my Interest. I’m working on the more “artistic” elements in post-processing. I have a lot to learn. I created this image last night:

This class reminded me that “way back when”, I purchased some presets/plug-ins from Topaz Labs. I resurrected those, reinstalled them, and played with them this month. I had fun!

E is also for EXPLORE, and EXPLORE is my word for this year. I have done a little exploring—mostly in terms of photography and a lot in reading. I’m exploring new ways of recording my “life” in art and in writing. I have to work on my One Word album. I’m a couple of months behind in recording. Now that the winter doldrums are passing, and the sap is rising, as the saying goes, I will get back into the work of exploring. I have two tools to encourage my explorations–kinds of adventure bucket lists, one for places to explore in South Carolina, and another for personal adventures. I haven’t opened either one except for a quick glimpse. It’s time to go for it!

So, excitement, enthusiasm, electricity, and explorations–all E-words to guide me.